Sex and the middle-aged man
Sex therapist Anna Kingsley tells you everything he won't
No more morning glory
Once men hit middle age, morning erections usually just mean they need to pee. Spontaneous erections are a thing of the past, too.
A little more limp
Gone are the days he could hang a bath towel on it. Now his erections arent so firm. The length and circumference will change as well and not for the better.
He may not be in the mood
Testosterone levels drop by half a per cent each year after the age of 40, which can result in low libido. Hell still ask for sex, he just wont beg for it any more.
A good warm-up
Direct action is called for. Hell need a lot of foreplay to get in the mood, but more for him should mean more of a warm-up for you, too.
It could be the end of those marathon sex sessions. He wont be able to get it up again quite so quickly. As he gets older, hell need a longer rest in-between.
What took only a few seconds when he was a teenager now requires a good 15 minutes. He might be hung up about taking longer to get erect and to climax. But are you complaining now hes finally learnt to take his time? No!
There may be times when he cant get there, no matter how hard he tries. And if he does make it, theres likely to be less of it and it wont be so forceful.
Peyronies disease usually comes on after 40. It affects one in every 100 men and is more common if your man has high blood pressure or diabetes. The disorder can cause willies to bend and make erections painful. But its not always a problem and help is available.
If your chaps had any treatment down below, it can trigger retrograde ejaculation. Semen that would normally be ejaculated gets redirected to the bladder. His climax will feel different and not as intense, and his wee will be cloudy.
He won't get help
If there are sex problems, drag him to see the doctor. These days, thanks to advances in drugs, psychological treatments and surgical techniques, success rates are over 90 per cent.
The drugs do work
Drugs such as Viagra and Cialis benefit 70-80 per cent of men using them. But they dont affect desire theyll only give a man an erection if hes sexually aroused by you.
Get over it
Dont fight your changing sex life get used to it. Go for quality rather than quantity, and explore the possibilities of real intimacy. Dont worry about your body he still finds you attractive. Its thought our brains rewire in middle age and long-term partners seem more alluring than they really are.